Thursday, April 2, 2009

A Big Shout Out to All My Pals at Animal Poison Control

Well it's official...I am the biggest April Fool ever courtesy of my wily Irish Setter Dugan...a.k.a. the Red Devil Demon Dog. Let me set the stage for you. I was super busy yesterday, too busy for any April 1st foolishness and I made the mistake of thinking I escaped any mayhem because no friends played any pranks on me. I forgot that Dog's have a sense of humor too. My day started with collars, many of them in fabrication. Late morning I went to pick a foster dog up and transport him to one of my dog nanny client's home for an interaction as my client is hoping to adopt a 2nd dog. Went well thanks for asking, the dogs are getting along famously. I drove the foster dog back to his foster mom and high tailed it to a nearby Starbucks (insert ironic foreshadowing here) and met with a gal who is starting a professional pet sitting service and wanted to pick my brain as I've run 2 successful services. Talked shop with her for 2 hours and then high tailed it to another client's home, fed/walked the dog and zoomed home to feed my own before running out again to meet friends for an April Fool's Dinner at a local restaurant.
Now I felt a little bad that I had not spent any quality time with my own pooches for most of the day...but my husband is on nightshift for 3 days this week so he was home with the dogs all day snoozing. They were not alone. There should have been no hard feelings.
I once worked for a veterinarian who in my experience is one of the most brilliant vet med minds I've ever met. Surgically he was incredibly talented - great diagnostic strategies, unbelievable work ethic. He did however believe that dogs do not do things out of spite. He did not believe dogs had the mental capacity to hold emotional grudges. This was the reason I had to sometimes step back and say "vets may not know everything." If this doctor spent 24 hours with Dugan he may have had to re-evaluate his hypothesis on spiteful behavior.
Dugan does not like his Dogmom to be away - we deal with this when I go out of town or have a day when I can't give him all the attention he demands. Last night Dugan told me loud and clear he was no fool and would not be ignored by a too-busy Dogmom.
We walked into the house post-dinner around 9:30p.m. and I was immediately struck by the fact that no dogs greeted us at the door coming into the mud room from the garage. Usually there is a festival like greeting with wagging tails and happy paws dancing about. This was my first red flag something was amiss. A quick walk into the kitchen I discovered the cabinet doors were open. Bowls and pots were on the floor. Those that don't have ill behaved dogs may have thought they were robbed and run from the home screaming "Burglar!" I however live with setters. I know better.
Then I smelled the sweet smell of... Starbucks? A look into the living room and saw the carnage. From a cabinet Dugan had dragged a sealed plastic container full of those one-cup beverage packages from our Flavia Hot Beverage machine into the one room with light colored carpeting and tore them open all over the place. I called the dogs and Dugan came hopping down the stairs like "What up girlfriend?" and Caelan and Fiona stayed hidden in the family room, ashamed of their brothers bad behavior. Panic hit me as I recalled some of those packets were coffee and hot chocolate. Caffeine and chocolate are toxic to dogs. I did a quick assessment of all the dogs and all looked fine, no drooling, no outward signs of distress. I got down and picked up the packets and it appeared the only ones that were ingested were the creamy foam topping ones. The rest just had puncture marks to spill contents all over the rug. Proving that just like humans - dogs love that creamy foam topping the best.
Looking at the huge mess ahead of me and feeling a headache coming on my husband said something only a husband would say. "Can you make me some sandwiches? I have to leave for work now."
To his credit he did clean up the plethora of packets and bring the steam cleaner inside from the garage before leaving for work. It may have been the look I gave him or the choice of language I used after the sandwich remark. Language not family friendly for my blog readers.
35 minutes later and 3 steam cleaner tank changes of Natures Miracle my carpet no longer looked like a coffee shop massacre had occurred. I climbed the stairs to go to bed...weary from my day when I smelled the strong scent of green tea wafting from the bedroom. There on my bed were 9 more packets punctured but licked clean on my 2 week old dusty blue duvet cover. A quick check revealed some decaf teas, more foam topping and a French Roast coffee. (insert more non-blog friendly language here)
Now here is the part where I would encourage people to call their vet and not do as I do. I've been around the block before with dogs who eat things they shouldn't and I was worried about the elapsed time and coffee ingested so I whipped out my vomit kit.

Oh you don't have a vomit kit for your dog? Clearly you've never shared your life with an Irish Setter that can open doors and cabinets.
So I sucked 20 cc's of hydrogen peroxide and water into my special vomit syringe and took Dugan out into the back yard and forced it down his throat. I waited 10 minutes. No vomit. I repeat...nothing. I call the Animal Poison Control Center and find the humor in the fact they pull his record up by my phone number and have all his information right on hand from our previous calls. You have to have humor when you are out in the back yard late at night covered in peroxide praying for your dog to puke.
Melanie my helpful Poison Control Center operator suggests my peroxide may be expired and not fresh enough and that is why he was not vomiting. (good to know) For the next 40 minutes I sit outside with Dugan watching him as Dr. Myers and the vet toxicology team at Animal Poison Control research all the ingredients and amounts of Flavia hot beverage packets and determine he did not get enough coffee to cause big time issues (like cardiac stress or liver problems). Further the hot cocoa mix did not have enough chocolate to be worried about even if he did ingest one. For future reference Doc Myers tells me for Dugan's weight and age he would need 5-6 teaspoons of coffee ingested to be concerned. (every dog is different though!) The coffee packet held far less (.09 of an ounce) so we were in the clear. $60 well spent and I urge everybody to have the ASPCA 24 hour Animal Poison Control phone number on their fridge. 1-888-426-4435. For those with setters perhaps store it in your cell phone as well.
So Dugan is acting fine and I let him inside. He immediately runs upstairs - hops on the guest room bed and vomits 3 times. Sigh.
So now I have 2 filthy beds I cannot begin to think about sleeping in and I commence gross clean-up, including cleaning the mattresses which alternately smell like cappuccino and dog puke. It is officially past midnight. April Fools Day is over. My husband is happily at work eating his sandwiches secretly glad he volunteered to work night shift. My dog is not showing any signs of toxic overdose. I am really tired.
I thought of the vet I worked for who believes dogs don't do things for spite or find a way to show their people their emotional stress. I guess that is why he was probably sleeping soundly at 1:00a.m. and I was running comforters and sheets through the laundry. Dugan approached me slowly as I lay on the couch waiting for the dryer to buzz. He snuggled at my side put his snout right beside my face and let out a sigh of content and I whispered to him, "I hear you...loud and clear."

6 comments:

  1. My 2 irish once ate 9 cubes of bright blue pool-table chalk. They then proceeded to throw up in all the wrong places....all because I let them play in the basement instead of lounging in their crates while I ran a quick errand. Gotta love setters!

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  2. Despite the fact that this all could have gone horribly awry, this blog cracked me up.

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  3. Oh, Shannon! I understand you. ASPCA Poison Control knows The Pickle. This past winter she ate 2,000 mg og Cipro and one prescription decongestant tablet one day and two days later shredded a 1lb bag of coffee beans. She also gets mad and pees on our bed out of spite. She hops up, looks at you and releases the stream. Somedays, we swear she comes straight from a horned devil.

    I still wouldn't trade her for anything.

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  4. Living with a setter myself, I've unfortunately had to do this - Bailey once ate a whole batch of no-bake cookies. Scariest moment of my life! SO glad your pets are ok. :)

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  5. Yikes - so glad your dogs are all ok! Living with a setter I have had privy to prison control. Bailey once ate a whole batch of no-bake cookies. Scariest moment of my life!

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  6. I agree with others. Despite the mess and stress it created the blog is hilarious. I feel for you. So glad everyone turned out ok.

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