Senior At Seven, Old Dogs and UPS Deliveries

Back in a the day when I worked in animal hospitals the vet-med pharmaceutical companies in all their wisdom coined the term "Senior at Seven" This was a PR program to alert unknowing dog guardians that their animal companions were actually in the geriatric phase of life after age 7 and had more specific health needs. Hey - you've got an "old" dog now! Not to poo-poo the efforts of any organization that supports the changing health needs of an animal companion, but these "Senior at Seven" campaigns were always accompanied by buttons, posters, pens and a script on how to convince a dog's person to spend $250 on senior specific blood work panels. Now that you're dog was a senior you better have their teeth cleaned too, do an echo first of coarse because your "old" dog was more at risk. If you think you're leaving the vet hospital without special shampoo and some flea prevention for your "old" dog you're kidding yourself too. Would you deny your sweet old grandpa health care? Well you better break out the checkbook once your dog is senior. (insert sarcasm here - directed at evil pharmaceutical companies that play off humans love of their animals...but that's another blog entry)

I always had to crack up at the "Senior at Seven" program as a setter person. For those not in the know, the setter is one of the slower "maturing" dogs. I once had a seasoned Irish Setter breeder tell me that their brains did not arrive until they were seven and it was usually by UPS when you weren't looking. According to this logic and the posters at the vet hospital I fell in love with a breed that finally leaves puppy hood mentality at the same point they enter their golden geriatric years. Sigh.

In the movie in my head senior dogs are calm, collected and wise. They sit on front porches without leashes and curl up near fireplaces after a sniffer of brandy. Their graying muzzles can be found in small town America sitting on a bench with senior citizens in front of a barber shop discussing baseball. They come when called and they allow small children and puppies to crawl all over them without fret. They always somehow seem to be Golden Retrievers.

My "senior" dogs are not like that.

Our little female Irish Setter Caelan turned seven this past Friday and it has been noted that her behavior has been especially deviant recently. My husband in fact searched the recycle bin for any evidence of a UPS box we may have missed after she gingerly helped herself to a steak that was on a plate on the dinner table last week "resting" with 3 others after coming off the grill. She also likes to steal the clothing you have put out to wear and drag it out the doggie door to the back yard as you shower. It seems she is using her finally mature brain power for evil instead of good. Likewise our male Irish Setter Dugan is 11 (perhaps older as he was a rescue) and he is more ill behaved than ever! Last night my husband and I went out to dinner for little under 2 hours. We came home to discover Dugan had opened the (child-proofed by the way) lower kitchen cabinets (which we child proofed for him as we have no children) and took the blender and toaster out along with assorted mixing bowls. He chewed up some Tupperware and the sponge out of the sink. Not to be outdone upstairs he left his calling card of late...the shredded into a million pieces roll of toilet paper all over the guest bedroom.

Instead of snuggling with hubby on date night I was on Amazon last night shopping for a dog crate for my SENIOR dog. How am I going backwards? It took years to get this dog out of the crate which I smugly donated to a new dog guardian thinking those days were way behind me. Now I have to reconfigure the laundry room to put a crate next to Lily's! Yes, Lily our little English Setter whom we adopted in October and is still not ready for full house roaming privileges when home alone. The elevenish year old setter crated next to the oneish year old year old. Double sigh. Can I get a refund for the movie in my head too?