Why Honey-Do Lists are a Must!

So this evening I was making a direction sheet for how to feed the dogs and cats. Oh - are you going on vacation Head Bitch you may ask? A little list for the dog sitter to reference? Um, no.

You see I am having knee surgery this week and henceforth will be off my paws for a bit. The list is for my dear husband. No, not a new husband who just stumbled into our home/zoo. Yes, the same husband that has lived here with the dogs and cats for years now.

My husband is wonderful, let's just put that out there up front. But when it comes to basic things...like feeding the dogs and cats he acts like he has no freakin' clue what he is doing. He will come up with many an excuse when I casually ask him to feed the furry children. "Oh - I uh, would, but I have to go pay the water bill online at this very moment."

On the rare occasion he does feed the crew he inevitably screws it up. He somehow manages to give the wrong dog the wrong food, gives inappropriate amounts of food, forgets their supplements or feeds one dog a whole can of tripe. (for those of you unfamiliar with what a whole can of tripe does to a dog's gastrointestinal system - let's just say you don't want to be downwind of the dog for the next 4-6 hours) The cats he forgets to feed altogether because when I say "feed the animals dinner" I did not specifically say "cats". The fact the cats circle around him doing the "I'm starving" song and dance routine is not enough of a hint they too may need some food.

Now I will admit the dogs all have different food needs and that I being a hyper-sensitive DogMom will sometimes change the diet and supplement routines. But this is by no means reason to not want to fulfill their basic needs of eating! When I tell Alex the dog's coats are looking a little flaky and we need to increase their salmon oil he acts like the world is about to end. "Oh great! You've changed it up again! I'll never remember the routine because you keep changing it...that's why you need to feed them, not me, I'll do it wrong!" he'll whine.

Secretly I think this is all part of his plan to feign stupidity to avoid having to feed them. This is a man who goes to work and takes apart mechanical and electrical systems and troubleshoots them. I remind him to give the dog's fresh water and he sulks "I have to feed them and change out all the water bowls!"

So in an effort to keep my animals from starving to death as I recouperate I've made a detailed list of who eats what and when and posted it in the cupboard where their supplements/medications are kept. I even bought the more expensive salmon oil with the built in pump as I can tell Alex "3 pumps of oil on Dugan's food" You know if I said 2 teaspoons and a half that would involve getting out a spoon and his day would be ruined. I even pre-measured the girl's raw food and put it in little individual containers for ease of feeding! I had a sit down with the cats and told them they need to come up with a new song and dance routine to capture his attention, perhaps something with costumes and neon lights pointing to their dry food bowl. I talked to the gal at the dog food store and she said all my purchases are on record so they can personally assist my husband in purchasing the right brands of food when he goes shopping there. She said most husbands that come in shopping only know the color of the bag of food they are supposed to get, so they help confused DogDads often.

So, we'll hope for the best and that after my knee heals and I'm on my feet again my furred-children will not be dehydrated, malnourished or 20 pounds overweight. Sigh.